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Woody Allen (1935 - ) US movie actor, comedian, & director

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
Woody Allen

Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
Woody Allen


To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
Woody Allen


What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
Woody Allen



When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
Woody AllEN


Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
Woody Allen